Dating Agencies,

My father joined a social club, I don't think it cost - but it was called 'Friends'. Might be worth looking around your area?

If you live in ipswich, there must be like minded people on the grapevine that live in your area that might feel lonely too and enjoy meeting for a coffee? Next question, do you work, or can you change your job- to meet new people. ?

I used to belong to this . Although it seems to have dragged itself into the 21st century now; when I belonged you received a monthly photocopied bulletin of arranged events, almost nothing was on line. There were also regular meetings where other events were organised by anyone who wanted to. Events varied from 'kite flying on Dunstable Downs to a week in Greece. There were named 'contacts' for each group though and they would look out for any newbies arriving.

Wasn't cheap, but you could contact the organiser of any event in any area to see if there were places or just turn up at the regular 'bar night' (meeting often in a pub). The idea is for singles to have others to socialise with, the arranged events are as varied as the membership; if you fancy a bike ride on a Sunday afternoon, you put it in the 'diary' and you 'organise it' (you are the contact for enquiries). If it was arranged several weeks in advance, it would be published in the bulletin and groups countrywide would see it and could contact you. If your group is well run there can be several events a week to choose from. I imagine it is run in a similar way now.

When living nr Watford I would regularly go to the West End when any of the groups near London were organising a theatre trip. I just met the group of people in the foyer of the restaurant. I was also within reach of three local bar nights.

Have a look at the sample events on the website to get an idea.

If you just want to socialise, this agency is great, however if you do want to meet someone there are more options within Nexus. Have a look around the site.

Sorry to go on a bit about this, but it was good when I was newly divorced and working very long hours.

If you're the outdoor type, there's Muddy Matches.

You don't tend to meet people out and about anymore, or at pubs and clubs. Most people are indoors on their laptops (like us!) ~ the stigma has gone from internet dating, it's really very normal.

As in real life though, you get people who will tell lies (about their age, looks, relationship status). Good luck x

What about your local volunteer group, ours are always looking for people to buddy up with like minded people for all kinds of activates form going for a coffee or a walk to swimming or going to a gym , just a thought good luck.

Thank you. It's the evenings I struggle with. Plenty of friends have told me I've got to get strong and start enjoying/loving me again before moving on. I think however, I've discovered I do need someone. It's the loneliness I hate and that's not going to get sorted on my own. I guess some of us thrive on their own space, whilst others need someone their.

I went three, maybe four years without a cuddle or closeness

....sorry, forgot to go on Chrome and the advert had nicked the rest of the box

I went three, maybe four years without a cuddle or physical closeness. It was hard, but what both A and I felt we had to do for the sake of the kiddies (stay together). Then I met someone and rediscovered just how much I love a hug and how watching carp on TV is suddenly bearable, because you're snuggled up to that someone special....I'm definately a snuggler and not a loner.

I have lots of friends and love them all dearly, but they're mostly mums with family and although I know I'd be welcome to pop round of an evening, there's the feeling in the way but also it just makes you feel lonlier, being the single one, knowing they're desperate to be having their snuggle time but through politeness for me don't.

Finally, do you have to put a picture up?

Some strategies for missing the company less (won't solve anything really, but until you find someone they might take your mind off the empty space)
Don't sit on a sofa to watch TV, sit in a chair you couldn't share if you wanted to.
Take up knitting (or something similar) which you can do while watching the less-than-inspiring programs, but couldn't do while snuggling.
The basic idea is to avoid situations where you COULD snuggle if there was someone to snuggle with. It's still lonely (often hellishly lonely), but it helps you feel strong enough to survive it. I had 12 years of 'mainly alone' (kids only home weekends, OH working at far end of country and only there a few weeks a couple of times a year), and the above strategy kept me sane (well almost).

Di, just a thought. Do you have a Gingerbread group in Ipswich? There are a lot of single dads out there, as well as single mums. Gingerbread - Home - Gingerbread - charity for single parents Even if no romance comes out of it, it could put you in touch with local people in a similar situation to yourself.

I've got the tab open and ready to look RL.

Thank you...and even if it sounds like I'm being miserable...I'm not Just taking the next step. xx

Good luck Di :-)

You don't have to. Some of them are awful ~ like the blokes who take "sexy" pics of themselves in the bathroom mirror on their phone

I'd use an avatar, myself, or a bit of mystery/privacy

Thanks RL & Di, Gingerbread looks good. Am joining up me self.

I wonder if Piskie would lend me her knees.