The Gardeners Rest #12 (2017)

[Nicos]

The option of open the box, or take the money.....

[veggiechicken]

................and, since we know what rary would choose, he is banned from taking part. Instead, he can stand in the corner and............

[Lumpy]

rotate the glitter ball until......

[Cadalot]

he gets a repetitive strain injury or the disco is over. The problem with the disco is that most of the grapes that remember it (Disco that is) try and recapture their youth (if he or she managed to escape) and most of them are now in their 60s - 70s, morbidly obese or trying to perform acrobatic acts of dancing that quite frankly their bodies aren't really up to anymore ......

[Nicos]

...apart from.....

[Lumpy]

Cad who launched himself into the fastest jive that anyone had ever seen. As his legs were kicking and flicking about he accidently...............

[jackarmy]

Started doing the chicken dance "da da da da da da da " he sang

"Oi stop taking the mickey" screamed.....

[veggiechicken]

...........veggie chicken, who was sat quietly in the corner doing the hand jive - although most of those present thought she was flapping her wings in her usual stroppy manner
"Anyone want to partner me in the Flamingo?, Must wear a shocking pink shirt with ruffles.........". Jackarmy stepped forward and............

[Lumpy]

bowed to the bar..............I'll be back in a mo and promptly shut himself in the broom cupboard.

All of a sudden spanish music started and it was getting louder and louder.............the lights went out and the cupboard door crashed open..................the spotlight lit up a circle in the middle of the dance floor and there stood Jack.

He was dressed as a matador except his cape was made from an old embroidered table cloth and his hat was a double handled stew pan..............he tapped his cuban heels to the music.

He was going to Passo Doublet with none other than Lumpy.

As Lumpy approached her bull fighter he had a go at spinning his table cloth (sorry cape) aroung himself.

Lumpy strode onto the dance floor with the biggest dangly light shade on her head anyone had ever seen (well it looked like a mantilla to her) and a red rose up her trunk................she prowled towards her matador who after having a look at the.....................

[JanieB]

...size of her...

[Lumpy]

promptly tried to hide behind Cad.

No you don't shouted Cad I want to see this dance in all its...........................

[veggiechicken]

.......proboscis, realised that they were a perfect match. His eyes lit up at the sight of her lampshade and he reached for his castanets, which had started to clack involuntarily. There was no stopping Jack now, he bowed low, before Lumpy and swept the floor with his tablecloth cape. His stewpan slipped to a rather rakish angle and, as Jack stood upright .................

(Just ignore Cad - he crept in mid story)...........

[Lumpy]

Cad stepped onto the dance floor and proclaimed that 'this dance is MINE all mine'.

There were gasps of amazement as Cad and Jack grabbed....................

[veggiechicken]

..............each other and shoved poor "little" Lumpy aside. Cad and Jack pirouetted and pranced, Cad's armour clanking in time with Jack's castanets.
It was a sight to behold, never before had the GR witnessed such a display.
It was truly unbelievable and..............

[Lumpy]

would go down in GR history as the night that Lumpy turned into.....................