Spoonerisms / Malapropisms

[rustylady]

Diabolical (biological) washing powder
Maggots (Mr Brains frozen faggots)

[Johnny Appleseed]

From an old Monty Pyton book

I've a gouse and harden in the country,
An ace I call my plown,
A treat I can replace to
When I beed to knee alone
Catterfly and butterpillar
Lurch on beefy plough
And I listen to the dats and cogs as they mark and they beooow.
Yes, wature here is nunderful
There is no weed for nurds
While silling by my window flutter
Biny little t*rds

[bubblewrap]

I loved it a couple of years ago when a newsreader on radio 4 commented that "the police appeared to be arresting more smug drugglers than in the past"!!

An American news reader reported on a drug addict using a hypodeemic nurdle.

[Johnny Appleseed]

Try not to get confused when you talk to your builder about leaving "Grit and shingle" all over your drive....

[Flummery]

I remember passing a hut selling surfing equipment that called itself The Kit Shack. Dr Spooner would have a field day!