Horrible Landlord

[Shadylane]

the fact that he thought that it was the threat of foreign neighbours was what upset me rather than him being an pillock.

I think that would wind me up more than anything. What an absolute tool. As for some of you lot - thanks for the giggle

[lizzylemon]

Good for you for sticking up for your convictions! Unfortunately, my family use those kind of 'descriptive' words when I'm around, plus blokes in the pub used to use them too. As you can imagine, family get togethers are an absolute joy for me (have on several occasions considered preforming a labotomy on myself with a blunt spoon to relieve the horror) and regulars now know not to speak like that in front of me after I've taken their drinks away and told to come back when they can behave like a decent human. I can't bear a bully of any sort.

[Hilary B]

It is not impossible that this..... individual.... imagined he was being funny. It's quite remarkable what some folk think is funny when they are the ones saying it.
There are a variety of ways of dealing with someone who is obnoxious, imagining them in some relatively embarrasing situation is about the best way of not getting upset about it.
Even the offensive word used, well it's a matter of context too. In this case he was obviously being nasty, but there are situations, among friends, where that sort of word might be used harmlessly. It's a bit like the 'Dangerous Dogs Act, the breed being banned doesn't solve anything, it's tackling the idiots who want a Dangerous Dog which is needed. Banning certain words won't stop idiots having that attitude!

[SlugLobber]

It's strange, but as kids we used to shorten the word pakistani routinely (my area was literally half populated with pakistanis, and yes, they introduced us to curries! ). It never occurred to any of us (including them!) that it was offensive and I'm still unsure as to how it became that way. I mean, you wouldn't be offended at being referred to as Brits, would you?

Funny how language goes!

I prefer not to imagine people like this on the toilet. It's much more satisfying to imagine me punching them in the gob. Yes, I know, not very ladylike and I wouldn't do it, but just the thought process is satisfying!!

[Piggle]

I have comforted myself in what goes around comes around -

His last tennant was a truely awlful person, regularly threatening his girlfriend with a good kicking usually loudly in the early hours of the morning and then making up with her ( loudly) with all the windows open... anyway he got fired from his job and had to move home. Can't say that I was sorry.

Anyone want to live in my flat..... lovely garden front and back........ no thought not!

[zazen999]

Even the offensive word used, well it's a matter of context too. !

Erm; I don't think that some words are a matter of context - ever.

[Potstubsdustbins]

The last person I heard using the 'N' word to describe a black person was my now 80 year old neighbour. She is a wonderful lady and you couldn't wish for a better neighbour. When I remarked that she really shouldn't use that word in this day and age she just looked at me and said "well he is a bad bugger" or words to that effect. The funny thing is that this lady is an original Jamaican who came here in the 50s.

Colin.

[Hilary B]

Erm; I don't think that some words are a matter of context - ever.

There are wods for which only rare contexts (including a very limited 'audience') make them tolerable, but there are none for which NO context can make them tolerable. This includes the name of the dog belonging to the leader of the Dam Busters.......

[zazen999]

There are wods for which only rare contexts (including a very limited 'audience') make them tolerable, but there are none for which NO context can make them tolerable. This includes the name of the dog belonging to the leader of the Dam Busters.......

I seriously hang my head in shame for you.

[VirginVegGrower]

my better half always tells me to imagine such people as having cabbages for heads. It does help

Do you lop them?

[snohare]

Imagine him sitting on the bog curling down a good one with his kecks round his ankles next time and I dare you not to smirk........

Baldrick, suddenly I find we need a vomiting emoticon...I now have the internalised visual equivalent of an earworm, like when you cannot get The Birdy Song tune out of your mind...

Zazen, I think I know where you are coming from, emotionally - but what about America, where the song lyrics by black rappers are full of the "n" word because it's okay for them to use the term - but if a non-black uses it, that's a different matter ? There's a case of contextual significance decided by the denigrated group; a sociologist would probably say they now "own" that derogatory term.
My attitude is, okay I might think something is off, see that an attitude is toxic, but if the person who the insult is aimed at doesn't care, then who am I to be offended on his/her behalf - I've seen that being taken badly, as being very patronising.
Sad, isn't it. As soon as a person is taught that others of a certain group are inferior, their life is poisoned, however nice a personality they may have...and it rubs off on all around them. Cubbuge heids indeed !

[VirginVegGrower]

We are all caretaking this earth and borrowing our little bit. That's how I feel about the world.

[Shadylane]

My attitude is, okay I might think something is off, see that an attitude is toxic, but if the person who the insult is aimed at doesn't care, then who am I to be offended on his/her behalf - I've seen that being taken badly, as being very patronising.

Well, personally I don't think you have to belong to the minority that is being 'insulted' to be offended. I'm mixed race and I find any form of racial slur offensive whether that be against whites, (3/4 of what I am at a rough guess) West Indies, (1/4 of what I am at a rough guess) or Asian. I do think though that there is a huge difference between offensive words being used in ignorance with no real malice behind them and genuine racial hatred.
Sorry if this makes no sense, i've had a wine.

[VirginVegGrower]

Hic and double hic

[Shadylane]

So lets talk about wine. Personally I prefer the large glass variety but on occasion I can be persuaded to go for the two bottles for the price of one...