How good are you at taking compliments?

[HeyWayne]

I'm not THAT bad, if someone said 'nice shoes' I could manage a straight 'thank you.' I'm not going to start yelling 'they're not nice shoes! They're rubbish! And ugly! I hate my shoes.' Etc.

However, a few months back I would imagine that might well have been the case. It could have been shoes, coats, dresses, hair....

Ormoans and all that.

Atchally, if you were anything like LadyWayne you would probably have just burst into tears rather than rant uncontrollably.

[Pumpkin Becki]

I'm not THAT bad, if someone said 'nice shoes' I could manage a straight 'thank you.' I'm not going to start yelling 'they're not nice shoes! They're rubbish! And ugly! I hate my shoes.' Etc.

Rhona, can I just say, this is still making me laugh, even when I was sitting infront of the tv last night, your post popped into my head and I burst out laughing, luckily my OH was in bed, he might have thought I'd gone mad . Thank you.

[Hilary B]

Good answer Hazel

For me (like most people, I expect) how well I can take a compliment depends on my relative insecurities! If someone says 'your garden is great' or 'that meal was delicious', I'm fine with saying 'thankyou'. On the other hand, if someone says something like 'you look nice' or 'you're a good mum' my immediate reaction is 'have you mistaken me for someone else?' (I mean, I've SEEN my wonky teeth and fishwives the world over would step back in awe when I'm really struggling with the kids... ).

But to be more jolly, I really don't know anyone here who isn't gorgeously fabulous

It is all about insecurities, including 'missing the moment'. There are times when I DO know what to say, but only when it really is too late to sound sincere (to myself at least), and 'thank you' for a compliment is exactly that sort of occasion. If it is about apperance, I tend to just 'go all unnecessary' and can't think of anything to say at all. The problem is that the few compliments I do get are NEVER about the few things I actually like about myself!

[TPeers]

Well all I can add is 'Thank you' to all the post here. I have just spent a good 5 mins laughing and grining like a loon.

Thank you - A lovely end to the day!

[Comfreyfan]

Oh no!!! I must be reeeeeally bad then When my friend said "I like your [new] boots" today, I said something like "Yeah, they're ok, but look, they haven't got enough lace hooks, and...."
Oh no! I'm self-deprecating on behalf of my shoes too! I must be beyond help...

Phew - glad it's not just me then! Although I'm proud of my veg and happily accept compliments then! It's just the personal stuff that makes me go weird!

[Seahorse]

Good answer Hazel

For me (like most people, I expect) how well I can take a compliment depends on my relative insecurities! If someone says 'your garden is great' or 'that meal was delicious', I'm fine with saying 'thankyou'. On the other hand, if someone says something like 'you look nice' or 'you're a good mum' my immediate reaction is 'have you mistaken me for someone else?' (I mean, I've SEEN my wonky teeth and fishwives the world over would step back in awe when I'm really struggling with the kids... ).

But to be more jolly, I really don't know anyone here who isn't gorgeously fabulous

[Hazel at the Hill]

I dont think that shows lack of empathy, I suspect you maybe a revoltingly well balanced and nice person!

Why, thank you! *smiles

[FionaH]

This is why my mum says that I'm not empathetic - a really really can't understand why it isn't as easy as saying 'thank you', with a nice smile. But I'm sure that this is my lack of understanding, so I'll try to put myself in other people's shoes more, if you try to accept a compliment once in a while.

And without going all 'self improvement manual' - if you put a mirror by the door and look in it before you go out you'll be able to see a lack of toothpaste and then smile at yourself and carry that grin outside. It'll get the neighbours wondering, if nothing else!

I dont think that shows lack of empathy, I suspect you maybe a revoltingly well balanced and nice person!

Oh no!!! I must be reeeeeally bad then When my friend said "I like your [new] boots" today, I said something like "Yeah, they're ok, but look, they haven't got enough lace hooks, and...."
Oh no! I'm self-deprecating on behalf of my shoes too! I must be beyond help...

I do that! "Oh they were dead cheap, a bargain, second hand" etc. I think we may be doomed Sarz

[Newbie]

well, i think you are all really rather lovely

[SarzWix]

I'm not THAT bad, if someone said 'nice shoes' I could manage a straight 'thank you.' I'm not going to start yelling 'they're not nice shoes! They're rubbish! And ugly! I hate my shoes.' Etc.

Oh no!!! I must be reeeeeally bad then When my friend said "I like your [new] boots" today, I said something like "Yeah, they're ok, but look, they haven't got enough lace hooks, and...."
Oh no! I'm self-deprecating on behalf of my shoes too! I must be beyond help...

[Hazel at the Hill]

honestly wasn't intended,but for some of us it really ain't that easy!!!
But if ever the occasion arises I promise I shall try my hardest to grin,Thank & zip up!!!xx

This is why my mum says that I'm not empathetic - a really really can't understand why it isn't as easy as saying 'thank you', with a nice smile. But I'm sure that this is my lack of understanding, so I'll try to put myself in other people's shoes more, if you try to accept a compliment once in a while.

And without going all 'self improvement manual' - if you put a mirror by the door and look in it before you go out you'll be able to see a lack of toothpaste and then smile at yourself and carry that grin outside. It'll get the neighbours wondering, if nothing else!

waiting with baited breath .... wondering if "hey, nice bum" is good enough to get me a girlfriend!

Now, do you think that you might have put your finger on the reason that you haven't got one ...

[Farmer_Gyles]

Next lesson will be 'how to give an compliment!'

waiting with baited breath .... wondering if "hey, nice bum" is good enough to get me a girlfriend!

[yoanbob]

Im rubbish at compliments too.
must try harder

[Pumpkin Becki]

I'm not going to start yelling 'they're not nice shoes! They're rubbish! And ugly! I hate my shoes.' Etc.

****wipes coffee off computer screen****

[Rhona]

I do think upbringing probably has something to do with it - if you aren't used to being told when you did something well it's so much harder when you get older I think.

Not here - my parents were VERY complimentary with me and my sisters. We got tons of encouragement and whilst we got told off when we needed it, we got many compliments to make us feel good about ourselves.

No idea why I can't take a compliment graciously. Depends what it is I suppose. I'm not THAT bad, if someone said 'nice shoes' I could manage a straight 'thank you.' I'm not going to start yelling 'they're not nice shoes! They're rubbish! And ugly! I hate my shoes.' Etc.