Male Midwife - Asks For Trouble?!

[SarzWix]

I think Hilary's is a good point - the interminable monitoring was the thing which caused all the problems for me first time around, and definitely increased the pain, and what prompted my request for an epidural. The second time was a home birth, and I only needed the portable gas and air because I was moving the whole time. The third was a hospital birth, but because I had the confidence to tell them to take their stupid machines away, I could keep moving and didn't need the extra pain relief.
So, maybe the Man Midwife is right in a way, but the way he's chosen to argue the point is completely wrong & patronising, and the whole system needs to be reviewed before they start trying to do away with pain relief choices...
I'd like to see him trying to pass something the size of a bowling ball, lying flat on a bed, with just gas and air

[kirsty b]

I had something called Meptid ( I was told it would act like pethidine, but without the sicky side effects) and gas and air. I was off my face Absolutely brilliant.

Like all the others say every birth is different, epidural need should be assessed for each individual, not a blanket pronouncement. Bonding though, thats pretty personal, so many different factors can affect this, not just medical intervention.

[Seahorse]

I think the BBC article might have been reported in a slightly 'skewed' way to make it more 'newsworthy'.

I can see that epidurals shouldn't be a 'first option' thing - and certainly not if it's to keep an about-to-be-mum quiet, or to mollify someone who is 'too posh to push'. However, having given birth to four of my own, I would never, ever presume to tell anyone else what level of pain they should be able to cope with

[HeyWayne]

Pain's a funny thing isn't it?

"I've had it worser than you"

Yet, truth be told, we'd all probably rather avoid it if possible.

I think epidurals during childbirth are used more often than they maybe could be because the decision to have them is often made before the pain actually starts - and for first time mothers you have no idea what to expect in terms of pain levels. The line has to be inserted before things "kick off", so when the time comes for the drugs to be administered I'm sure a lot of women would prefer the pain to stop (as would any sensible person) and the switch is flicked.

Those that don't have it have often made up their mind long before that they are going to be as drug free as possible.

I could of course be wrong - I am a man who has no idea about pain.

[SarzWix]

Well I can honestly say that the pain when I broke my ankle first time was as bad as labour! But then I had 2 shots of morphine - no-one expected me to just put up with it

[julesapple]

May I suggest not giving this chap anything remotely connected to pain relief, and then pulling a very large bowling ball out through whichever nether oriface he chooses? He might well a)shut up or b) change his opinions.

What a complete & utter, total prat.

Jules

[madmax]

After I qualified as a radiographer I wanted to study midwifery - but I was blocked.. 'Cos I was a bloke. I still am come to think of it!

Anyway, my view as a man is that the mother knows best - she feels the contractions, she feels the pain and as a male he will never experience the miracle (ok - a rosy description of it) of pregnancy and childbirth he should listen to the mum in labour. All too often I have come across female midwifes who base their professional attitude to labour on their own birth experience.

I didn't listen to this guy but I can assume he was unreasonable?

[LizyDrippin]

Here's my Tuppance worth on the subject,

Yes he is male, BUT he is a Proffessor of midwifery, not just some bloke mouthing off, he has used years of evidence to come to his conclusions,he has been selectively quoted (always a bad idea) and perhaps comments taken out of context. The FEMALE obstetrician agreed with him, why isn't she getting it in the neck as well?

In my opinion. Professionaly qualified men with years of experience can talk about what their job is, can a surgeon not talk about surgery unless he has been under the knife.

So what if he hasn't given birth, I have, doen't make me qualified to give my opinion, my three labours were very different from each other and nearly every other female in my family and friends.


And just a little extra I have never seen a baby the same circumfrance as a bowling ball



.

[Finedon.Dandy]

Its funny - the one thing I am worried about at the mo is wether my lead twin (Pea) moves out of the breach position. If it doesnt I will HAVE to have a C section and I dread that. Not only am I very lucky in that I actualy enjoyed my previous two labours but it is one of the parts of finaly being pregnant again, that I am looking forward to. This is compounded by me feeling so ill and tired all the time the whole way though this pregnancy so far and at 26 weeks my discomfort, the growing pains in my belly at least, can only get worse. With Bluebelle I only had some gas and air and with Bashfull I didnt have anything. I do remember the feeling each time when I had got to a point where I simply couldnt bear it any longer but then before I could even get the words out I went into transistion, the pain changed and I was fine. I do have extreme empathy for those that arent as lucky as me - a close friend and my sister both had terrifying labours so I know my experience isnt in any way the norm. Another reason I dread having a c section is that I cannot keep still if someone touches my back as its so sensitive so I know it would be hell on earth for me to be told that I have to have an epidural.

Back on the point though, I would imagine that the male in question may now decide he wants to emigrate and change his name etc in the process - I bet he is the colour of most of our tomatos. I do also feel that proper support and advice given to pregnant women on labour is distictly lacking and that if this was addresses the ratio of c sections to natural labours could be drastically reduced.

[srodders]

Taking away the pregnancy issue and concentrating on pain. I beleive that experiencing severe pain goes towards making you as a person.
If the most severe pain you've ever felt is shutting your finger in a door then every pain you get is compared to that, with that as a maximum, therefore most pain will be seen as a major drama.
However if you have suffered great pain as in childbirth, or multiple fractures (as I have) then you tend to put things into a better perspective, and make less of a drama out of the most trivial things.

[Hilary B]

Taking away the pregnancy issue and concentrating on pain. I beleive that experiencing severe pain goes towards making you as a person.
If the most severe pain you've ever felt is shutting your finger in a door then every pain you get is compared to that, with that as a maximum, therefore most pain will be seen as a major drama.
However if you have suffered great pain as in childbirth, or multiple fractures (as I have) then you tend to put things into a better perspective, and make less of a drama out of the most trivial things.

I see where you are coming from, although I think it isn't only the experience of pain, but also the experience of how your family reacted to your childhood pains. My sister was... not unsympathetic, but decidedly brisk, about bumps and scratches, until the day her son, aged about 5, came in bleeding from his chin (split open when he fell against a concrete step) and sobbed "I think I've hurt myself". That was when she decided that she had somewhat overdone the 'teaching to be tough about it'.

[tiachica]

I have been very fortunate that I had a very straightforward pregnancy and birth (1st child, 5hrs no pain relief whatsoever). I tried gas and air for the stitches afterwards, but they made me feel very sick and didn't help the needle pain.

I don't think that the pain is essential in bonding with a baby. I think it's more the whole process of nurturing life inside you, going through birth, nurturing the life outside of you. You forget the pain anyway. And I am not sure if I remembered the pain I would bond quite as well with my baby... Who would want to bond with something that causes pain? And if the pain is so important, why has mother nature arranged for the mums to forget about it so quick?

[Finedon.Dandy]

And if the pain is so important, why has mother nature arranged for the mums to forget about it so quick?

if not we wouldnt be mad enough to have another! The human race would soon die out then eh!