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  • #31
    So sorry. Know just how you feel.

    Well not quite. A couple of years ago my daughter was diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma and underwent months and months of gruelling chemo, then a stem-cell transplant. Everyone thought she was going to die and she had a farewell party for all her friends. She was very ill. Throughout all this I could hardly sleep and used to do gentle house-work in the early hours of the morning listening to the World Service. I just wiped down paintwork and cleaned things. It gave me a way to channel my anxiety and anger and I ended up with a much cleaner house but I cried all the time in the most innapropriate places. No-one minded.

    Making something to commemorate your baby would be a very good thing to do. Perhaps plan a little bit of your garden to the memory. Rosemary is the plant to use for that - or perhaps plant a special tree. One that you've always wanted.

    Luckily, my daughter made a miraculous recovery against all the odds and is now very well. Another daughter had a miscarriage a few years ago - and since then has had a boy and a girl.

    Miracles do happen!

    All my love.

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    • #32
      hello

      very sorry to hear your sad sad news. I have no personal experience of this so can't offer any advice other than that if you need help don't be afraid to ask for it.

      love jackie

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      • #33
        Hi Tammy, so sorry to read of your sad news. It's hard to bear at the time, and although loved ones and friends are kind and helpful, grief is something you have to work through yourself in your way. There have been lots of good suggestions of things to do to pass the hours, you could also try online competition sites. You might win yourself a nice weekend break or something for your home, and the closing dates are usually days, weeks or months away, so looking to the future.

        Take care
        Linda

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        • #34
          I'm truly sorry for your loss

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          • #35
            tammy, so very sorry for you and your sad news. have been through it three times before i had my first child. During the time i had to rest i always ended up making jigsaws. It won't take the pain away but it will help to pass the time and eventually it will get a little bit easier. I also got books on tape and CD from the library. If you are lying down to rest it can be quite relazing having someone to read to you.
            You are in my thoughts and prayers as it is just about the saddest thing to go through.

            And when your back stops aching,
            And your hands begin to harden.
            You will find yourself a partner,
            In the glory of the garden.

            Rudyard Kipling.sigpic

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            • #36
              sending our thoughts to you & yours at this awful time
              The love of gardening is a seed once sown never dies ...

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              • #37
                So sorry to hear your news Tammy. I don't really know what to say, having never been in the same situation. I would just say go with your feelings - if you feel like curling up in a ball and crying your eyes out, then do so - I think that would help more than bottling things up inside. I can't even begin to know how you feel, except, just take things one day at a time, don't rush, and hopefully in time you will feel better - I this will always stay with you, but that it will hurt a little less with time. Bernie aka DDL
                Bernie aka DDL

                Appreciate the little things in life because one day you will realise they are the big things

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