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  • Laughter is the best medicine

    Here is a few lines that will make you laugh


    1) The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

    2) I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

    3) She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.

    4) A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

    5) The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

    6) No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

    7) A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

    8) A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

    9) Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

    10) Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

    11) Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    12) Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, "You stay here; I'll go on a head."

    13) I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    14) A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: "Keep off the Grass."

    15) A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, "No change yet."

    16) A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

    17) The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

    18) The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

    19) A backward poet writes inverse.

    20) In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

    21) Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects


    All the best to those not in the best of health right now, I am thinking of you.


    Gardening should always be a pleasure and never a chore,only someone forgot to tell the weeds

    "If you don't have a plan, a goal for yourself, then you are almost certainly a part of someone else's"

    "The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dream is you"

  • #2
    Oh very good david that gave me a chuckle
    Dont worry about tomorrow, live for today

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for the laughs David, and good to see you having a chucke Allotmentlady. Been thinking about you.

      From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs.

      Comment


      • #4
        thanks david,nice to have something to raise a smile
        sigpicAnother nutter ,wife,mother, nan and nanan,love my growing places,seed collection and sharing,also one of these

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        • #5
          Laughed my socks off, as did FOH, nice one David.
          The cats' valet.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Alice View Post
            Thanks for the laughs David, and good to see you having a chucke Allotmentlady. Been thinking about you.
            Thanks alice xxxxx
            Dont worry about tomorrow, live for today

            Comment


            • #7
              Laugheed out loud but it might have been the gin............
              http://www.growfruitandveg.co.uk/gra...gs/jardiniere/

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              • #8
                Thanks for giving us a laugh
                My hopes are not always realized but I always hope (Ovid)

                www.fransverse.blogspot.com

                www.franscription.blogspot.com

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                • #9
                  Nice one DavidM31 - made me chuckle a lot
                  All the best - Glutton 4 Punishment
                  Freelance shrub butcher and weed removal operative.

                  Comment

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