Grow Your Own Magazine

Does anyone else have to put up with an Allotment 'Know-it-all'?

These are the people who spend the majority of their waking time tending their allotment, who look down their noses at the efforts of others, and freely bore you to death imparting their 'wisdom' whether its asked for or not.

I think I'm getting close to telling ours to "eff off"

Maybe I am doing things wrong, maybe I dont have the best tools, maybe I should be planting things differently.......I don't care! Its my allotment, not yours!




Ahhh, that's better

__________________
Frank
....never buy a dwarf with learning difficulties - it's not big and its not clever!

Do it your own way effigy. When they offer you their unwanted advice, tell them that, yes, that's one of the theories you've heard before. Cast a seed of doubt!

__________________
It takes more oil than vinegar to make a good salad dressing.

vegheaven.blogspot.com Updated Sept 7th 2008

yep, my next door neighbour tells me stuff all the time, then him and his wife have a giggle at something i've done,just cos he has 40 years of experience and i haven't any.... i just nod and smile sweetly now, then carry on ripping out anything pink from the garden, that apparent'y i should leave cos they are very rare ....... funny how he doesn't want them when i've ripped them out lol

i'll have the last laugh when everything grows though

__________________
sometimes i do talk complete and utter rubbish ...... just ignore me if i do ........i'll go away eventually

http://teachy.myminicity.com/ind

My elderly next door neighbour is a bit like that. When he is out, he will lean over the fence and tell me that this or that won't grow properly, or that I'm not doing something right...

Actually, the latest is that veg gardening is a man's job and I should just let my husband do it, as I'll just mess it up.

Which makes me laugh, as Mr OWG has absolutely no idea when it comes to actually planting/growing! He is great at demolishing stuff, designing and building stuff, hard landscaping etc, but hasn't a clue about planting, weeding or anything!

__________________
"Its not who you are underneath, it's what you do that defines you" - Bruce Wayne

I always wear my headphones to ward off unwanted chitchat from the neighbours - they aren't plugged into anything, but my neighbours don't know that do they!!

Don't want to sound big headed here but............... I have the opposite problem. My allotment neighbours ask ME for advice without realising I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about!

__________________
My Majesty made for him a garden anew in order
to present to him vegetables and all beautiful flowers.- Offerings of Thutmose III to Amon-Ra (1500 BCE)

"they aren't plugged into anything,"

FanTAStic!

sorry effigy i think the head phones are the best idea. i am lucky there are only three members on our site so we very realy meet up and we all are novices we just enjoy trying. but help each with advice if asked.

My neighbour is a bit like that. Back in April when he asked my if my broad beans were growing well, I said that they were about a foot tall. His response was,"well, mine are flowering". He always has to go one better!
Experts, hey?!!

I think healthy competition is ok on the lottie, but if you do get the ones that get up your goat, then with a friendly smile on your face, tell them to go and bo--ocks.

__________________
good Diggin, Chuffa.

As a 40yr girlie on a predominantly male over 60yr site, I was a magnet for every bodies advice!

My come back - growing the best early brassicas, especially my caulis. Those who gave advice so freely have come seeking - I feel a total fraud, I've never grown them before!

I've got a new neighbour this year; (female) and ten years my junior. She's the new target. We opperate an early warning system where we signal each other if we see an approaching offender (bit like Meerkats) - then we find vitally important things to do in our sheds!

The security desk man at work keeps telling all and sundry that I'm a plant wizard, despite me saying I know ten percent of naff all, even told the people from the company that tend our grounds and indoor plantings. Really embarrassing!

Hello its only me!!You don't want wanna do it like that you wanna do it like this!

__________________
The greatness comes not when things go always good for you,but the greatness comes when you are really tested,when you take,some knocks,some disappointments;because only if youv'e been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.

The chap next to me can be a bit like but he has also given me stuff or offered to.
I just nod and answer in the right places and get on with what I want to do. He is ok really and I take some things he says with a pinch of salt. Another bloke tends to talk about this chap behind his back sometimes in a nasty way, that I dont like, and I have ignored him and now he doesnt bother me.

When I first took on the allotment, my OH wasn't very interested but as it was very overgrown said he may come down and help with the heavy digging. For the first few weeks he stayed away and lots of the fellow allotmenteers would stop and encourage my attempts at pulling brambles, nettles, mares tail, couch (oh! the dreaded couch). A few weeks into the new plot OH came with me and really got stuck in - and sucked in! The point of this ramble is that now OH spends more time at the plot than I can and all of the (mostly male) plotholders only stop to talk when he is there. If I am there alone they just drive/walk on past with just a wave of the hand. But I get to hear their 'advice' second hand from OH who is convinced that they know better. They probably do but I would like to make my own mistakes or successes and I have ideas that I would like to try despite being advised that it is wrong (via OH).

Allotment know-it-alls on our site now have OH on their side How do I solve this?

Its recently came to a head when the Know-it-all told my son the hoe he had just bought was 'crap' (his words) and he should take it back and buy one like his.
He then spent a good twenty minutes droning on about the virtues of his 'Supadupa Excel 5000 Wondahoe, complete with Go-Faster stripes and all terain grips'

Its taken a lot of work to get my lad into allotmenteering - I really could have done without this big-mouthed to$$er!

__________________
Frank
....never buy a dwarf with learning difficulties - it's not big and its not clever!

Allotment men are worse gossips than women are. They stir up so much trouble and aggravation amongst themselves.
They're just bored ... newbies are good sport, and they can show off their knowledge & experience to someone else at last. I hate to say it, but men do need to feel superior to women, as well. Just put up with it, you won't change them.

It's your plot, do what you like. You have to make mistakes in order to learn. You can't learn everything all at once. Once in a while, you'll make a great discovery by doing it "differently". But do take advice graciously if it's meant well.

People don't like someone to come in and do it differently ~ because it's like being told your way is wrong.
I see newbies next to my plot doing it all wrong, but I keep shtum until I am asked for my opinion (they strimmed off the couch grass instead of digging it out ... now it's all coming up amongst their crops and they can't get it out).

__________________
~ What do I think of Western civilisation? I think it would be a very good idea ~ Gandhi

That's my Father in Law, that is !
I get told I'm wrong all the time ... I shouldn't cycle, I should drive. I shouldn't be vegetarian, I should grow my hair, I should this and that, and t'other. I get told how to grow my allotment (despite having 13 yrs experience, as against his Nil years)
It really winds me up, so I just avoid spending time with that person now.

__________________
~ What do I think of Western civilisation? I think it would be a very good idea ~ Gandhi

I find if you do really really strange things they leave you alone.

Like, building a bed with a mound on the top [flattened off] and a moat around the outside. Then leaving it for a couple of months and just weeding it.

Once you have all the weeds sorted, sow carrots and onions on the top and put leeks around the outside.

Then leave it again.

They have no idea what it is.

Carrots and onions grow, and as you pull them, the soil falls over into the moat, blanching the leeks. Simple.

I'm the only one who has beds, so i don't grow in rows.

Now my plot is flourishing they have backed off.

__________________
Andrea :wavehello

http://www.growfruitandveg.co.uk/gra...logs/zazen999/

moon trial underway with onions, lettuce, tomatoes and calabrese.

Fibber! See Snadger's pants on fire! I've never heard you talk anything but sense, you little rascal!

__________________
It takes more oil than vinegar to make a good salad dressing.

vegheaven.blogspot.com Updated Sept 7th 2008

I only got my half plot in March. However, last year at the village show I was spurred on by the good-natured competition here with our virtual veg show, and I entered some vegetables for the first time. I put 3 things in, got a first a second and a third prize and instantly got the respect of the allotment crowd (especially the bloke who ALWAYS gets a first with his broad beans.) They are often puzzled by what I grow - no-one's seen purple podded peas or borlotti beans before, no-one's heard of most of the toms I'm growing. However, they happily chat to me about them, and I've been given spare lettuce plants etc. I think after a season, when they can see that you are a serious vegetable grower, the constant telling you what to do will die the death. Assuming you haven't died of anger/boredom in between, that is.

__________________
It takes more oil than vinegar to make a good salad dressing.

vegheaven.blogspot.com Updated Sept 7th 2008

Oh yeah, I also forgot. Grow stuff they won't have seen before either.

I've got oca, romanesco, quinoa and I'm waiting for anyone to ask 'what are they?' Ok, romanesco look just like broccolli at the moment but in a few months...

__________________
Andrea :wavehello

http://www.growfruitandveg.co.uk/gra...logs/zazen999/

moon trial underway with onions, lettuce, tomatoes and calabrese.

What I enjoy about allotment advice is how it is often completely contradictory.

I like to experiment and some of my ideas have been laughed at for a year or two and then, if they turn out well, I find that suddenly others will be copying me. Also I find that some of the things suggested to me- that I have initially though were silly- I have later seen the sense in and will try and fit into my schedule. There are pros and cons to a lot of methods and it is a matter of finding what works for you. We all have our successes and failures and you'll find that something you grow will be better than your neighbours and you can all learn from each other.

A few weeks ago a newbie lady at our site told me I would be best to earth up J artichokes...'Oh, I didn't know that' says I. She gave a little cheer and a big smile because she taught me something...very sweet.

Although I appreciate that some folk are not particularly good at being subtle, can be irritating or worse stop you getting on with your work. The majority of folk are well meaning and encouraging...They want you to succeed and stay.

Th