When does age become a problem

**NOG** · 18-07-2009, 07:31 PM

I did for that women in spain that had a child at 66....cos she died 3 years later. If she was an only child when the Dad dies she is all alone....

**SarzWix** · 18-07-2009, 07:39 PM

I think it depends on lots of variables, a lot of it down to the parents outlook on life - some people are already 'old' long before they hit 60, some people remain 'youthful' in outlook until the day they die. I think it would be awful to be a teenager with a pensioner parent who didn't understand/remember the way it feels to be young and impulsive.
In most instances, I think 50 is probably the oldest - if a natural lifespan is 3 score years and 10 (70) then a twenty year old might be reasonably expected to cope in the world on their own if needs be. And the menopause would be kicking in around then for a lot of women. Having older children already would make a difference too I guess...
Lots of variables can make a difference!

**Snadger** · 18-07-2009, 07:41 PM

I believe it is natural for a childs parents to grow old with there kids. If the parents are older they are from a different generation and more akin to grandparents. I think it's easier, physically, for a youinger person to have babies and less chance of any abnormalities with the children?

Probably wrong...........but thats the way I see it!

**BumbleB** · 18-07-2009, 07:43 PM

Originally posted by NOG View Post

I did for that women in spain that had a child at 66....cos she died 3 years later. If she was an only child when the Dad dies she is all alone....

I think she had twins and was a single mother. So they are already orphans, although I read a article from when they were born and she said that they had other close family.

I think that in lots of cases a woman would prefer to not have further children past her 40's only to feel she might be more ready again in her mid fifties. A 'young' retiree for example might welcome a time when she could devote her time energies and better bank balance on bringing up a child. It is such a individual thing though so will be different for everyone.

**rustylady** · 18-07-2009, 08:04 PM

I don't know how anyone of that sort of age has the energy to cope with a young child. It's OK when they're babies, but anywhere past that you need loads of energy to keep up with them. I suppose most of these older women are rich enough to employ a nanny for the physical stuff, but that's not my idea of being a mother. I'm mum to four, and grandmother to 7 and 8/9ths

**jackie j** · 18-07-2009, 08:36 PM

The twins are going to be brought up by her nephew, is that fair on him and his family. My mum, my sister and myself have all had babies in our early 40's. I am now 54 and I certainly wouldnt want a baby now at my age. My sister died at the age of 56 leaving a child of 12. My mum was 92 when she died and hopefully I will be around for a while yet.
I think 45 is plenty old enough but that is my opinion evryone is different. My eldest sister is now bringing up a teenager ( 14 ) and she will be 60 this year, she had her own children in her early 20's so she would be free of children now, her choice. ( apart from grandchildren ).

**Alice** · 18-07-2009, 08:38 PM

I think nature should just take its course. It's all for a reason. When women are past childbearing age they should accept that. Beyond that requires unnatural intervention and it just doesn't sit easy with me - any more than test tube babies do.

**smallblueplanet** · 18-07-2009, 08:43 PM

How many people are we talking about here? One, two...isn't it always going to be the case that some women get pregnant at an older age? What age are you going to draw a line at, and how!

**lizzylemon** · 18-07-2009, 08:53 PM

My personal opinion is that there's a reason mother nature stopped women from having children all through her life span and I say don't mess with it.

I wish I'd had my daughter when I was younger but only for purely selfish reasons. I would like to have much longer with her (assuming that I'm going to live to a ripe old age) as a younger person so we could do more stuff together, and well, basically just have more time together on the planet full stop.

(and weirdly so she could see me as a prettier younger woman and not the knackered bleary eyed saggy skinned munster I am most mornings now - vain or what!!) .

**rustylady** · 18-07-2009, 08:55 PM

Originally posted by smallblueplanet View Post

isn't it always going to be the case that some women get pregnant at an older age? What age are you going to draw a line at, and how!

If they get pregnant by natural means, then fine. However, I don't believe that women past 45 should be able to buy babies by IVF or whatever they call it.

**lizzylemon** · 18-07-2009, 08:58 PM

Originally posted by smallblueplanet View Post

How many people are we talking about here? One, two...isn't it always going to be the case that some women get pregnant at an older age? What age are you going to draw a line at, and how!

Post menopausal should be (already is?) the cut off point as a womans body can not carry a child once the menopause has happened. No more hormones are produced once the eggs stop.

(Ironically the news reports were saying that they actually think it was the hormones they had to pump into the woman to sustain the pregnancy that caused the cancer she subsequently died of. )

**smallblueplanet** · 18-07-2009, 09:14 PM

Originally posted by lizzylemon

My personal opinion is that there's a reason mother nature stopped women from having children all through her life span and I say don't mess with it...

Does that mean getting rid of all IVF then?

**bluemoon** · 18-07-2009, 09:21 PM

Oh, No!!!!!!!. I had my first child at 21, which looking back was probably a bit young, but I wouldn't have wanted to be too much older. My S-I-L was born when his mum was late 40's and dad early 50s, they're both dead now, never knew their grandkids and were actually older than my parents and therefore, obviously, older than his wife's gran. I was young enough to enjoy my children, plenty of energy for swimming, camping trips and rushing about from A to B taking them to football practice, ballet lessons or whatever. I love spending time with my grandchildren, I'm still young enough to do most of the activities with them, but it's lovely to be able to send them home afterwards, not sure I could do it 24/7 now.

**Polly Fouracre** · 19-07-2009, 11:11 AM

I don't think 21 is too young to have a child. Young mothers ,as well as boundless energy and stamina, a healthy, thick placenta to nourish a growing baby.
I have four children and would have loved more, until I got to 40 that is, when the thought of babies made me feel exhausted!
Then was the time to care for grandchildren which is very rewarding. Now, in my late 50's, I love to have my older grandchildren to stay but wouldn't have the energy (or patience!) to care for toddlers for long.
As for having a baby of my own now! I would have to ask one of you to take it in!!!

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