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Old 04-12-2007, 12:27 AM
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Default Advice Please - Winding Down A Young Child...?

Hiya

Okay, so I had round the diabetic nurse today and the question came round about how much sleep my 4 1/2 year old boy gets of a night. He doesn't get enough for his age group.

Anyhoooo, she suggested not having telly on the hour before bed and hekping him wind down better etc, etc but I'm totally stuck for things to do that won't stimulate him too

She suggested reading but 7 days a week for one hours, olus his usual story in bed would I recon become a bit boring for him, plus I don't think I own that many books!!

Do you knowledgable grapes have any other ideas other that reading to help wind him down?

Ta
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Old 04-12-2007, 01:04 AM
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i think the main thing isn't so much the activities as going for a quiet calm atmosphere for the hour before bed, the age old ignore the fuss and speak quietly, be gentle, smile lots (not that i think you're anything but the rest of the time!) to help him feel relaxed and mark a 'wind down' phase of the day...

he'll understand routine and markers so little things like helping to put toys away and clearing the decks to signal the end of playtime and the start of 'wind down before bed' time

you could make a bed with him for his toys/teddies out of a cereal box etc then get him to put them in bed and read them a story? or make lunch for the next day together (to take to preschool or eat at home - whatever suits your lifestyle)
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Old 04-12-2007, 02:19 AM
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Cheers happyplanter... Yes, I guess 'Dog the Bounty Hunter' isn't exactly calming telly viewing for him, hmmmm... me thinks that's going to need to stop!

Yes, I guess making his packed lunch for the next day would good, and he could help me get the washing over the radiators etc as he likes to be able to help etc... and let's face it, I guess that's hardly very exciting, lol!

His routine at the mo is telly till bed time, then toilet, teeth, insulin and bed with a story. But I got the distinct impression earlier it might not have been enough of a wind down to get him to bed eariler?
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Old 04-12-2007, 08:58 AM
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I would suggest spending some time doing a jigsaw as a good way to help him wind down. It was about the only thing that would make our younger son sit in one place for more than 5 minutes when he was small. Reading him a bedtime story was a waste of time as he would keep jumping up and running around, acting out bits of the story! Also wouldn't be too worried about the amount of sleep he gets so long as he doesn't seem overtired. Mk2 son never slept more than a couple of hours at a time when he was little - I think he was 5 or 6 before he had what I would term a good night's sleep! We would hear him awake for ages in the night - singing or chatting to himself. Just as with grownups, kids need different amounts of sleep.
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:20 AM
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Mine were 2 years apart and had a bath together at that age before bedtime with a few simple toys thrown in.
Toilet, teeth and into bed and a cuddly story in bed whilst still warm and glowing.
The older one would then go to own bed and read quietly until sleepy.
No TV at that age after eating either for mine!
A warm hot water bottle covered in Fungus the Bogyman for one child and a squashed dog hotty for the other as well as teddy would lull them to sleep.
I like the calming idea of a one to one . Nice and bonding
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:40 AM
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I never slept for the first two years of my life - a fact that Mum has permanently etched on her brain for some reason....

I'm not a big sleeper, which drives Lady Wayne mad. Herself likes to get at least 8 hours a night, whereas I'd be happy with 6.

We's all different.
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:45 AM
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HeyWayne - we've said it before - but are you SURE you're not my son! He was a dreadful sleeper - woke every hour and a half - didn't just chatter or play but bawled till he had someone else awake. He didn't sleep all night till he was at school. Even now he sleeps well but can easily get up at 4.30 for bird ringing purposes (BTO trainee).
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Flummery View Post
HeyWayne - we've said it before - but are you SURE you're not my son! He was a dreadful sleeper - woke every hour and a half - didn't just chatter or play but bawled till he had someone else awake. He didn't sleep all night till he was at school. Even now he sleeps well but can easily get up at 4.30 for bird ringing purposes (BTO trainee).


I actually quite enjoy getting up early - reminds me of when I did my paper round as a lad. I'm up early tomorrow (got to fly to Germany on business), and I have to leave the house at 5am, I'm quite looking forward to it! Not getting back home until 9pm is a bit of a poo, but you gotta do what you gotta do...
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:58 AM
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Ahhh! Come to mummy!
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Old 04-12-2007, 11:43 AM
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Jigsaws, stories, tidy up, baths... try reading a story when he's in the bath... that keep my twins occupied, helping set out breakfast things for the next day.. then maybe just before bed... choosing some clothes for the next day, laying them out... talking about if he thinks it will be rainy, sunny, windy etc.. go out together and buy a blank journal and ask him to draw a picture of what he done today, and maybe a picture of what he had for his dinner... little things to help him sit quietly and focus.

Hope that helps!

Good Luck!
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Old 04-12-2007, 12:04 PM
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Like others have said, we're all different, including kids. I don't doubt the nurse was trying to be helpful but is he actually tired during the day? Did you think there was anything wrong before she mentioned it? If not, I'd carry on as before. None of my four have had the same sleep patterns or needs and I don't think there would be any point in trying to change them.

That said, if you don't have the time and energy to read/do jigsaws etc for an hour or more *every* night (I certainly don't!) CBeebies show lovely wind down type programmes between 6 and 7pm, including a bedtime story read out loud.

Claire
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Old 04-12-2007, 12:08 PM
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When OH's two were little we used to sit for ten minutes talking about the day - what was their best bit and their worst bit - while they were in their pj's so they knew it was almost time to sleep. A warm bath always helped as well if they were a bit too 'hyper'. But as others have said, we're all different. My OH goes to bed at dawn for an hour or two, while I have to struggle to crawl out of my pit no matter what the time!
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Old 04-12-2007, 02:02 PM
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Hi Shortie, don't have any little ones of my own but I imagine that watching T.V. right up to bedtime is probably not helping him to wind down unless you can find something really boring on (politicians pretending to tell the truth?) for him to watch. I think a bath definitely helps to make you sleepy & a nice snuggly warm but not too hot bedroom. If you haven't got time to read a lot of books together maybe you can get a stock of picture books & first readers that he can look through by himself as well as with you.
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Old 04-12-2007, 02:20 PM
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don't forget warm milk, very soporific!
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Old 04-12-2007, 03:09 PM
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Hmmm.... I'm liking the puzzle ideas, I'll give that a go in his room with his dimmed light on...

He's never slept loads. By the age of 2 he'd dropped his afternoon nap (much to our dismay ). New bubs - 4 months - is the same... goes through the night but I'm lucky to get him to sleep for 30 mins during the day

But as you say Seahorse, I guess I started trying to rectify something I didn't think was wrong before hand... he doesn't look tired during the day so maybe shaving a bit of time off for our own sakes, but yes, I guess he's actually fine
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Old 04-12-2007, 04:37 PM
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With four children and nine grandchildren I can say,hesitantly,that I've learned a thing or two!
Routine is the best step forward.An hour before bed-time start to wind down.
Bath,without hilarious play(difficult)story(the library has an endless supply)and a few routine moments.(one of my boys had to have the witch caught by her feet and thrown out of the window!!??)But the words of a short poem or a prayer would do.
The thing then is the difficult bit .THAT IS THAT!! No more stories,hugs,dragging witches from under the bed,nothing.
Also a sleep pillow,a bit of muslin or thin cotton stuffed lightly with polyester wadding and a handful each of lavender,hops and lime flowers and put inside the pillowcase will relax him.
Good luck!One of my girls as a small baby would sleep maybe four hours out of twenty four(she is still alive,God knows how!!)Thankfully she slepr alright before her brother was born fourteen months later.Phew!!
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Old 04-12-2007, 05:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lainey lou View Post
don't forget warm milk, very soporific!
Ovaltine or Horlicks works (well it does with me)
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Old 04-12-2007, 07:29 PM
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Just 14 months between mine two (mind you they are now 28 and 29!), but they always had their bath everynight and then in the PJs we all used to cuddle up for about 10 mins or so and talk about what a great day we'd had and what we were going to do the next day etc. Sometimes a story, but not always. It didn't always work, but they were lovely enjoyable times - I missed these times when they got older. Waiting to cuddle up to the grandchildren now!

and you'll know yourself Shortie when he's not getting enough sleep. For all that the boys were very close they were very different to each other and often had different patterns of sleep etc. at different ages. Wait till you get to the teens, you can't get them out of bed at all!
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Old 04-12-2007, 09:35 PM
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maybe a particular book associated with bed? dim lights, fibre optic ones are good, a nice bath, milky drink, a visual timetable (so to speak), easily made with pictures laminated of his day, he can then order them, the last one being in bed tucked up etc, maybe photos of your child you could use. a board of different fabrics, silky, smooth, furry etc, nice warm textures to touch. some of the lamps you can buy with revolving pictures, maybe fish or something are quite relaxing. quiet time music maybe. got to agree with Polly Fouracre re - routine, sure you know this anyway. i think it is nice to include a child with a change to routine which is where the picture thing comes in,they have a decision in it. quiet voice time associated with stories, always relaxing. you don't say if your son is hyper before bed or whether it is just the fact that he needs less sleep,some kids do. hope this helps and i haven't waffled too much, let us know
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Old 04-12-2007, 10:46 PM
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My boy has ASD and OCD so I know what you are going through.
What worked for us is Book tapes, or a favrot video.

At bed time put on a book tape and then let it run, we have the boy in bed at 8 but lights out at 9 so he has an hour of book tape or video. You should find that after a while he will associate the book tape or video with bedtime.
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Old 05-12-2007, 08:06 PM
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The evening bath is a real lifesaver (for Mum). It seems to get them all warm and sleepy. Bath them, bring them downstairs for drying and dressing (no telly). Drink of milk and maybe a biscuit, then upstairs - clean teeth, toilet and straight into bed for a short story. Then lights out and leave the room. It will work, given time.
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