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Life in the Orkneys?????

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  • Life in the Orkneys?????

    I'm sure the locals have heard this before...I had a little chuckle when I heard it...I'm bet it's to keep the tourists away from such a pretty place!!!!

    The Bloody Orkneys

    This bloody town's a bloody cuss
    No bloody trains, no bloody bus,
    And no one cares for bloody us
    In bloody Orkney.

    The bloody roads are bloody bad,
    The bloody folks are bloody mad,
    They'd make the brightest bloody sad,
    In bloody Orkney.

    All bloody clouds, and bloody rains,
    No bloody kerbs, no bloody drains,
    The Council's got no bloody brains,
    In bloody Orkney.

    Everything's so bloody dear,
    A bloody bob, for bloody beer,
    And is it good? - no bloody fear,
    In bloody Orkney.

    The bloody 'flicks' are bloody old,
    The bloody seats are bloody cold,
    You can't get in for bloody gold
    In bloody Orkney.

    The bloody dances make you smile,
    The bloody band is bloody vile,
    It only cramps your bloody style,
    In bloody Orkney.

    No bloody sport, no bloody games,
    No bloody fun, the bloody dames
    Won't even give their bloody names
    In bloody Orkney.

    Best bloody place is bloody bed,
    With bloody ice on bloody head,
    You might as well be bloody dead,
    In bloody Orkney

    -- Hamish Blair
    "Nicos, Queen of Gooooogle" and... GYO's own Miss Marple

    Location....Normandy France

  • #2
    Bloody heck that is good ..jacob
    What lies behind us,And what lies before us,Are tiny matters compared to what lies Within us ...
    Ralph Waide Emmerson

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    • #3
      That was written by a man posted to the base in Scapa Flow during WW2.
      Orkney's beauty isn't really best described as 'pretty', it can be far too wet and windy for that, but incredibly lovely on a good day. I lived there for 15 years (1985 to 2000), and only economic necessity drove me south again.
      Flowers come in too many colours to see the world in black-and-white.

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